With the above question at DearCupid.org, I was flabbergasted at how a man whom is age 30 to 35 would ask such an uncanny question as that. I guess he hasn’t had much experience or mental maturity for this sort of thing?

My response was quite to the point.

This shouldn’t be a matter of “how many times should…” but a matter of “how do I pleasure my…” Understand?

It seems so premature to ask a question like that because things like love and consideration, sex, pleasure, and care shouldn’t and couldn’t be measured. It’s all a feeling.

For a lot of people I know, including myself, we gauge what we want to do for our partners based on how we feel about them, and more often than not, if we love our partners, or if we like them a lot, we usually just want to do things for and with them.

Eg: If I’m going out with a girl right now, the more I see her and interact with her, the more I want to hear her voice, spend time with her, know and understand her thoughts and feelings. These things translate to me wanting to care about her, care for her, be worrisome about her health. I want to kiss her, hug her, pleasure her. I want to take her to places. I want to do this and that, etc, etc, etc. Let alone if she was my wife!

I cannot and will not measure how many times per week I should take her out. I cannot and will not measure how many times we should have sex. I cannot and will not measure how often we should kiss or hug, or do things together. These things should all be based on a combination of energy, emotion, practicality, and relation. It’s so relative.

Seriously, it’s gross that there are people out there who date, get married and then ask in my opinion, rather dumbfounded questions like that. It’s weird.

AND guess what? That same guy comes back and asks “What is the average in the u.k?”


So my response was a tad blunt in sarcastic ridicule:

WHAT?!?!?! Are you even reading?!?! You can’t! There is NO average! Are you really 30 to 35?!?! Seriously! NO! There is NO SUCH THING!

Wow. Is this real?


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